cosmordinary

In this infinite cosmos we have only one life each. A life in this infinite cosmos is just like a dust in the world. Born by chance and die in necessity. Feeble life and boundless world, two facts we face. Even if you spend your whole life solving them. You will get nothing. - 1998

Saturday, October 08, 2005

孔融“父母于子无恩论”

回来的这些天观察了哥嫂对小侄女的作为,前两天又听老罗语录谈及孔融“父母于子无恩论”,今天就细细读了来龙去脉,觉得有道理。以此为戒,以后若为人父母,不要以施恩者自居,不居功,不市恩,作为子女对父母孝顺,也不必背上报恩的包袱,父母和子女的关系应该是比好朋友更好的关系。下引钱钟书《管锥编》的举例:   

  《朱子语类》卷一二六:释氏以生为寄,故要见得父 母未生时面目。黄蘗一僧有偈与其母云:“先时寄宿此婆 家”;止以父母之身为寄宿处,其无情义、灭绝天性可知! 盖不知孔丘家儿早有“寄物”、“寄盛”之喻,较“寄宿”更簿 情也。古希腊诗人亦谓:“汝曷不思汝父何以得汝乎!汝 身不过来自情欲一饷、不净一滴耳”(If thou rememberest, O man how thy father sowed thee……Thou art sprung from incontinent lust and a filthy drop)①。后世诗文中,习 见不鲜,举数例以概。十七世纪英国名作:“汝子被诃,倘不服而反唇曰:‘何故生我?我初未乞求诞生也!’汝将奚 如?”(what if thy son/prove disobedient, and, reproved, retort, /“Wherefore didst thou beget me?I sought it not!”)②;又一剧二角色相语 ,甲云:“若翁生汝,汝则杀之,足以报施,”(Cutting his throat was a very gund return for his begetting you)乙答:“老革初未尝计及生我,渠只自述快意耳。”(, Twas for his own sake, he ne''er thought of me in the business)③《海外轩渠录 》言小人国法令谓父母生子女出于情欲(by the motives of concupiscence),故子女 于亲不必有恩义(obligation)④。当世波兰小说中母诫未 嫁女毋外遇致有孕,曰“吾不欲家中忽添婴儿”(But I don''t want a kid here),女怫然答:“汝之生我,几 会先事询我愿不乎!”(You didn''t ask me if I wanted to be born)⑤;一意大利小说中母 责女曰:“汝对阿父语,不得如此。”(Guarda che non dovresti ripondere cosi a tuo padre) 女藐之(alzava le spalle)曰:“我初未求出世,汝二人专擅,遽使我生。”(Io non avevo chiesto di venire al mondo. Mi ci avete fatta vemire)⑥吾国旧号“孝治”,故率言如孔融者 不多耳⑦。

  另一方面,以父母立场发言的,钱钟书也别有举例:

  十八世纪英国才妇(Lady Mary Wortley Montagu)致其女(the Countess of Bute)书曰:“汝不必感我诞育为人, 正如我不谢汝惠临出世。俗见多妄,每以孝思绳子女,吾生平绝口未尝道之。”(You are no more obliged to me for bringing you into the world, than I am to you for coming into it, and I never, never made use of that commonplace(and like most commonplace, false)argument, as exacting any return of affection-Letters.“Everyman''s Library”, 400)母久劬劳,而持此论,尤罕事也。

不止钱钟书,胡适,李敖等都有类似论调
http://read.lnd.com.cn/read/liao/200509/993620050927.htm

1 Comments:

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